The Overthinker's Journal

Let’s take a moment to salute the bravery of the Chicago Cubs baseball team!

Last night, they played a game in the middle of “war-torn hellhole” Chicago.

I imagine the players have trouble breathing, what with all the smoke from the city burning to the ground.

I can’t imagine how they even got to Wrigley Field to play. I hear the situation on the streets of Chicago are worse than Baghdad or Kabul.

Also, props also to the Portland Trail Blazers!

I don’t even know how they will manage to play a basketball game tonight in that hellscape and the ruins of the former city of Portland. I hear it’s nothing but ashes now.

Surely the Moda Center was destroyed by Antifa insurrectionists?

I bet that frog-suit guy personally tore it down.

You can’t trust a frog. One minute they’re looking at you and saying “ribbit.” The next minute they’re singing “Hello, My Baby” while no one else is looking.

I don’t know how these players do it.

Amazing bravery.

Huge.

Like nothing ever seen before.

Thank you for your attention to this matter.

I hope I don’t have to tell you this is snarky satire. But just in case someone doesn’t recognize it, it is.